Just updating the thread with a new month! We find out what the gender of our baby is next week (as long as baby cooperates) I just can’t wait to call it by it’s name. I’m having strong boy feelings, but am hoping for healthy. I know our daughter Cadence is watching over us. ❤️ I’m currently 14 weeks! I hope this pregnancy goes by fast.

Thanks for updating the threat, April. I'm happy you've reached the milestone of the second trimester and am so happy you get to find out the gender soon! How exciting.

I personally had a real scare today and I'm still a little shaken up. Yesterday around lunch I started having this really unusual "pressure" and kind of a dying in my cervix, and I figured I'd overdone it with exercise the last couple of days. I woke up this morning again. Since I have an incompetent cervix and am getting a cerclage soon I was really worried that my cervix was opening/shortening because the way it happens is without pain and often without any symptoms at all. Eventually after about 5 phone calls with my mfm-, another mfm, and my on, I got an appointment for ultrasound and cervix check. Baby was jumping around happy as can be, heartrate 165, and my cervix was completely closed. I was so relieved on my way home that I actually cried- this is the first time I've actually felt fear in this pregnancy and hope that this will be an experience that is few and far between. I'm only a little over 11 weeks right now. I'm happy I listened to my gut though. I feel like when I went into preterm labor with my son last year that I downplayed what I was feeling and waited too long to call. Also my son's first birthday is coming up on the 22nd, so I've been having some heavy grief creeping slowly in. For now, things look okay though.

Thread*!

My auto-correct is so bad on my phone, no dying in my cervix, stinging* I'll recheck my post next time.

Oh Allison, that is so scary - I'm so glad to hear everything was ok. The first time I really felt fear in my pregnancy after loss shook me so hard too. I'm glad you went in and got the reassurance you needed. In my second pregnancy, I felt slowing movement and we went straight into the triage area to get checked and I kept telling myself I was being silly and anxious, but I sobbed like crazy when they found the heart rate. However - the growth scan the next week showed slowed growth and they induced that week, which made me feel more confident in my instincts. Hopefully once you get the cerclage, you will feel much more reassured and the fear can just be an occasional visitor. Also, I have to say - I was really having trouble trying to imagine what a dying in your cervix would feel like - stinging makes much more sense.

April - so glad you are past the first trimester hump and are looking forward to finding out the baby's sex and name. I have a strong "girl" feeling for this baby, but I think we'll wait to find out as we did for our other two.

I am a little over 11 weeks now. Next week, I am doing the NIPT and the NT scan and I think at that stage, I'll feel like this pregnancy might actually be real. We have to pay for the NIPT out of pocket, so I'm hoping they check for a heartbeat first.

SR, as soon as I re-read my post about the dying in my cervix I kind of laughed. Maybe it was my subconscious thinking about what it'll feel like getting it stitched shut in about a week. I got the NIPT testing the week before last week (no results yet) and will be having the nuchal test done and genetic counselling before my cerclage. I'm holding my breath a little bit until we have all of the results.

I have strong girl feelings here too. We won't be finding out the sex until birth though. I walked into what will hopefully be the nursery in our house the other day and got a little zing of excitement about decorating it. It's a room in our new house that I've been avoiding over the last year. A little bit of hope feels refreshing!

SR you're getting closer to the second trimester too! We decided not to do the NIPT testing because we didn't want to receive a huge bill for it. My last pregnancy was low risk, as the loss happened while I was in labor, but I definitely understand that you would want them to check for a heartbeat first. It's been really difficult for any doctor to find the heart rate this time around with the doppler, due to scar tissue from my c section. I feel movement, so it doesn't worry me too much, but I would like baby to get bigger so that they are easier to find. Fortunately, my doctors are amazing and just take me for an ultrasound when they can't find it without wasting any time.

Allison, I'm sure it's difficult to wait for all those test results, probably brings up a lot of anxiety. This summer, my husband and I did a lot of reading/journaling/crying in our nursery. It's already set up, but a few weeks ago I decided to clean everything and shut the door so the cats can't go in it. It brings me peace to see that it's ready to get the finishing touches again, and I enjoy being in it.

I am having major boy feelings for this pregnancy, and I know that whatever it is, it will be perfect for our family. All we want is a healthy baby to hold and love.

April

Funny you say that @April, we ended up getting a scan on Friday after the midwife couldn't find the heartbeat with the doppler. All looks good so far. And they managed to do a full NT scan because the baby appears to be measuring more in line with my LMP - which would put me a little over 13w, but they're going to stick with the due date estimated at the dating scan, which puts me at almost 12w. We did the NIPT today, so we'll get the results back on Friday. @April - we also lost our first baby during labor. We've gotten the NIPT for all three pregnancies now - the first time my insurance covered it even though I wasn't AMA or high risk because I was close enough to 35. Then after we lost him, we just wanted as much information as possible, even though we then had to pay for it. If I were younger, I'd probably just stick with the NT for this one, but we're old enough now that it makes sense. Thankfully we're in a position where it doesn't pinch the budget too much.

I'm waiting until we get the NIPT results back and then I am going to buy a few things for this baby and some maternity items for me - which makes me more excited. I didn't feel hopeful enough in my last pregnancy to do any of that, so it's a nice change.

I was right, it’s a boy! More importantly, he’s healthy and active. My placenta is in the back this time, so I’m pretty sure that’s why I feel him constantly, and why we can feel him from the outside already too. So very much in love 😍

That's great news, April! It must be such a relief to feel movement already. I'm three for three now with anterior placentas, but I guess the good news is that I don't know the difference in feeling movements.

April, I am so happy for you, and happy that your sweet boy is thriving.

I got the NIPT results back (all good) met with the genetic counselor (all good) and had my NT scan yesterday (all good). Our baby was so active that they could barely get images at the right angles. It was really funny actually, after the tech was struggling for pictures, she had me use the bathroom to see if the baby would stop rolling and doing the worm, and I came back in to find out the baby was now standing on their head. A doctor came it to take a look, just to see if she could get a better shot and sure enough our baby was still bouncing around on its head and swinging arms and legs. It really made things feel really real. I am really nervous for my cerclage Monday, but am feeling more and more safe in this pregnancy.

<3

Allison, that's great news! My NIPT results were also all good. Phew, so glad we've passed this hurdle. Good luck with the cerclage on Monday. I'l be thinking of you.

Cerclage went well and I'm home for a few days recovering. Yesterday I was really really sorry and today I'm pretty close to normal. The spinal was nerve wracking and so was checking in on the baby afterwards to make sure they were fine after surgery was too. Doc said everything went perfectly and my stitch is nice and high. This is a huge milestone for me and am grateful we made it through this mental and physical hurdle. Yay.

Yesterday I was sore* not sorry :)

Allison - I'm so glad the cerclage went well and I hope you're feeling better (mentally and physically) now. I never realised what an involved procedure it is, though I guess if I'd thought about it more, I would have. I'm enjoying having all our test results back, feeling a bit better now, and just focusing on getting through the next hurdle - which for us is an international move, followed by returning to the doctors who took care of me during my first pregnancy. I'm already looking into a therapist to help me deal with the PTSD associated with that hospital, but I may end up hiring a doula as well.

Wow, an international move! What a change, especially during pregnancy, I'll definitely be thinking about you and the things you are going to have to go through the next few months. I completely understand the anxiety of being in the same hospital as your previous loss. Initially I wanted to change hospitals as well, because there is an excellent one less than an hour away, but decided against it. My reasoning might seem silly, but I just want a happy ending at our current hospital. Thinking of you ladies, hoping you're feeling your little ones move around soon. <3

April