Our son was born still a little over five months ago. One week ago we found out we were pregnant again. Somehow I feel more lonely now than ever.

In the early weeks and months of our loss, the babyloss community has helped me significantly. Reading all the stories and talking with other parents suffering with loss was and continues to be so comforting. With the announcement of our second pregnancy I can't help but feel guilty that we're pregnant while so many others aren't. I know I have lost a lot of readers because of this pregnancy and would love to reconnect with others.

Are there any pregnant-after-loss mamas reading who are looking for a new pen-pal? I could really use the interaction. Or other blogs perhaps? Thanks in advance!

Cheers,
Julie

Julie - I'm pregnant again as well (8 weeks pregnant and 4 months from our loss). I'm not blogging about it yet (I'm holding off in case anyone from real life is reading). But I'm happy to be an 'email' pal - I'm madeline.taylor at gmail.com

I felt excited immediately after the positive result and then in some ways it made me really sad. I think it's just that thing that no matter how well (and all I can do is hope that happens) things go now - nothing is bringing Matilda back or changing what we've been through.

And I feel bad for all the other Mum's that desperately want to be pregnant and aren't yet.

You can write me or visit my blog anytime, Julie. My loss is pretty new and I'm not pregnant yet, but I am happy to hear from anyone. It helps me to read about people trying again, it gives me hope that my heart can handle it. It also gives me an idea what to expect. I have a living child so I don't have the problem that many women do after losses. It doesn't hurt me so badly to hear about a pregnancy or birth. I hope you are doing well so far, please take care of yourself.

Hey Julie!

Please don't feel guilty. You shouldn't. This is a good thing! Things will happen for the rest of us as they happen, and there is enough on your plate to worry about without adding guilt on top.

Congratulations again on your pregnancy - you can ALWAYS email me; I'm around whether you need to vent or whine or chat.

Hi ladies
I'm pregnant again too and would love to be in touch - ccramer(@)wwf.org.za
xxx

Hey Julie! I'm with people here - I'm almost 22 weeks pregnant with The Next Baby, and about a year out from our son's death.

I know how hard it is in the beginning and how fragile things seem....I can only tell you what my experience has been but I will tell you that for me, the thing that is underlined repeatedly is that no two pregnancies are the same - my pregnancy with Oliver was not the same as my pregnancy with my daughter, and the pregnancy with this little guy is not the same as my pregnancy with Oliver either. It's its own thing, and this little guy is going to be born completely fine - I so completely believe that.

To me it doesn't feel sad, or like a betrayal of Oliver or anything else - it simply feels joyful; like a celebration of him, if that makes any sense at all. Like "I loved you so freakin much that I am more than willing to walk this path again - I am joyful to walk this path again and joyful that Oliver will be part of this little guy too." Perhaps that doesn't make sense; it's more emotion based than anything.

Actually the only thing driving me bonkers at the moment is that I'm not sure what little guy's name is yet. Minor problem to have though.

Be well and write any time.

Christy.

Christy, that is a really beautiful way of looking at things.

And, Julie, no need to feel guilty at all. Speaking for myself, I want each and every mother on this board to know the happiness of bringing home a baby.

Christy, I absolutely adore your perspective.

Christy - what a gift your comment was. I never thought of that perspective. Thank you.

Christy, I wish I had your perspective!

I'm 18 weeks pregnant, just over 7 months out from our loss. It's bloody hard, and yes pretty lonely too. I do talk about my pregnancy on my blog, and am happy to be contacted too.

Hi Julie
I am 5 months out from my loss, and am not pregnant but am TTC. I love reading others blogs who are pregnant after a loss because it gives me some hope to hold on too and also an insight into what I might go through and how I might feel. I certainly wouldnt stop reading your blog because you are pregnant and I am not. Wishing you all the best and I look forward to reading your blog

To All,

We are 7 months out from our loss of our son Henry, and I am 20 weeks pregnant, and happy to email or chat about this experience anytime with any of you. Just contact me through my blog...

XO
Mindy

Julie (and all),

I am almost a year out from the full-term loss of my daughter (she died due to complications during delivery) and newly pregnant as well. 14 weeks to be exact, and only now letting myself say it out loud. Would love to have someone to chat with as I do find this to be a stressful (although hopeful) experience. You can reach me at gaylehorn217@yahoo.com.

I'm sorry you are feeling such mixed feelings. I know them only too well. Of course, I'm 33 weeks pregnant with both my twins (Will, who died at 24.5 weeks) and Abby. I feel quite out of place on the 'for one and all board' recently and am feeling extremely confused and lonely about my place with being babylost and pregnant at the same time.

Anyone is welcome to my blog or to email me at eve_62025@yahoo.com.