We lost our little miss s 14 months ago and a month ago our.rainbow arrived and i feel most ppl are expecting me to be over miss s. That i've moved on. They don't get it when I'm not only happy og lucky as I used to be before miss s now that we have a live baby that breath and screams. That is the reason why i feel so alone in this. I'm (we are) supposed to parent miss s older sister and here younger sister, and Keeping the memory of miss s alive. I'm so tired of ppl not getting that it's hard. I'm missing a supportgroup for babyloss parent with rainbows.

Hi Scandinavian endo-girl, oh I hear ya. I am walking beside you and feeling the same things. It's hard, so hard. I even think it seems harder as I can physically show my love for my rainbow, but not for my boy. I ache for him like I did back in the beginning, I have that awful feeling in the pit if my stomach that I can't shift. People don't get it, very few still ask how we are. I have no solution, but just wanted to let you know I am here as well, and you are not alone.

Hi there, it's really hard. Earlier on after losing Zia I got the feeling that everyone just wanted me to be okay, to be grateful that I "at least" still had a living child and I started to feel really angry because it's not that I was not grateful for my son, I was missing my daughter and those are two separate things. You need to know you're not alone as karen said, we all deal with this from time to time, you do what is best for you, others will keep up if they need to. Their views on how you should live your life don't really matter, no matter how close they may be to you. I am sorry you're feeling this way.

'They' don't get it, no, but I do...
I've lost count of the number of smiling people who now refer to me as 'Mum' now that I have a living boy (as if I wasn't one because my first baby is dead?) Or those who refer to my living son as our first?? It's ridiculous.
Such innocent comments & expectations that many will never think of once they've uttered the words, but that you, and all those of us who know what it is to lose a baby take to heart, and struggle with.

I am sure, from how I've read that you write of your little miss s, that your love for her will continue to shine, as you mother her second sister... I only hope that people around you will recognise that, and that they will continue to love her and remember her with you, as we all do here x

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Oh my gosh. Scandinavian endo-girl I totally understand what your saying and I feel the exact same way. Thanks for posting it makes me feel like I'm not alone and someone out there understands.
We just had a son three weeks ago after losing our first son a year and half ago. It's so hard having another child. I love home so much but but my heart is so saddened that we lost our first son. people seem to forget this is our second child. And they don't get that I still and will always miss him terribly and having another child doesn't help or change that :(

It is so heartwarming to read your answers, It's so good (but also sad) to know that there is someone out there that are deealing with the exact same things as I am deealing with.

I've had some rough days again this week. Missing miss s more than ever when here little sister is growing day by day.