I finally found out we were pregnant after years of infertilty. My partner had a indifferent response to the news. At our first appointment there was no heartbeat and had stopped growing. I feel like a failure, I didn’t know the baby passed, couldn’t sustain the pregnancy and now I fear due to age, weight and other health issues, that if we try again it will be the same result, another missed miscarriage, another D&C and we will be never be parents. I just wanted to be a mother. I just want my baby to be here. And the only person I can talk to about this is turned off and I don’t think wants to talk about it. How do I grieve? How do I go on? I fee alone.

M,

It is incredibly unfair. The burden of infertility and loss is so, so heavy. It's easy to become bitter and angry when it feels like everyone around you is having children and just carrying on with their lives. You are a mother. You are a mother who suffered an irreparable loss, a hope and a vision for this baby's life that was extinguished too soon.

Reading the essays on Glow in the Woods always helps me feel a little less alone. Pregnancy and Infant Loss Support Groups are also a good place to show up with your grief.

I'm so sorry that you and your partner are dealing with the grief in very different ways. That is not uncommon. Attending a support group together or seeing a couples' therapist may open some communication. It's so hard.

I see you.

Lynn