So, I am a almost 33 year old (will turn 33 in October) insulin dependent diabetic that is currently 29 weeks pregnant.
Back story our first born J was born in 2009 with severe spina bifida and left us on boxing day 2012. Her sister A was born healthy in 2014 and is currently 4 years old. Thus far between 3 ultra sounds and a 3D ultrasound everything looks fine with this one.

My gyno has asked me the last few apts about getting fixed but says to make sure I am 100%, which I am not. It might just be my paranoia but I just can't say that I am never going to want another baby. My SO makes good points at this point by the time this one is 20 we will be in our 50's and the older I am the more risks I have to contend with if I conceived again. A is quite a handful and who's to say that this one will be any different. I just can't say that I am going to be 100% or that I ever will be. After loosing J I don't think I ever will be, but taking the option off the table completely makes me even more nervous and anxious and I can't explain it.
I am not saying his points aren't valid but I just don't know....
Anyone else ever felt like this or are going through similar emotions??
How did you decide?

Hi Tsukia

I’m sorry to hear you are feeling pressured on this. Is your doctor asking you these questions unprompted? I admit to feeling that is inappropriate by the doctor. Or is your SO the instigator? I am not aware of whether it is easier to reverse getting fixed for a man or a woman, but if this is something he feels stronger about, should he be the one getting the procedure done?

You have experienced the loss of a very loved child. Your uncertainty about whether you really want to preclude the option of more children in the future seems natural to me.

There seems to be a thread in your message about concerns on your age...am I interpreting that correctly? In my country, the average age for a woman to have her first child is now 30-31 years old. The average life expectancy is approaching 90. We live in a different time to our mothers, and our grandmothers. We also had access to options that they likely did not. You are 32. Please do not feel pressure about your age. You are still young.

Wishing you all the luck in the world for the coming months.

Hi Tsukia,

My OB did the same thing to me. With my last pregnancy he brought it up at every appointment. He had good logical reasons (pregnancy and I don't mix). I was 34 years old at the time and I just couldn't do it. I was so afraid of losing another child and then not having the ability to try again. I'm now three years older and we haven't had any more children, but I could, which I am happy to still have the option. Don't let them pressure you. It's your decision, follow your heart.

My doctor has asked but the pressure is coming from my SO.
Thank you both, I just needed to know that I wasn't alone and that it is my choice.
My age is part of it but there are other medical reasons even in this day and age that are of bigger concerns.

Tsukia, you and I were on the same pregnancy thread with our 4 year olds. I just wanted to say that at this point in your life, and during a pregnancy shouldn't really be the time to make such a final decision. There are other ways of preventing pregnancy, without making an irreversible decision. And yes, if your SO is big on this, maybe he should inquire about his options. This would put less pressure on you. Good luck wtith your pregnancy!

Thank you all for your insight and opinions. I am still haven't decided on what I am going to do in any direction but I am feeling better about how to go about this.
Thank you all.