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Parents of lost babies and potential of all kinds: come here to share the technicolour, the vividness, the despair, the heart-broken-open, the compassion we learn for others, having been through this mess — and see it reflected back at you, acknowledged and understood.

Thanks to photographer Xin Li and to artist Stephanie Sicore for their respective illustrations and photos.

for one and all > Miscarriage

My daughter-in-law went in for a 7 week ultrasound and there was not baby developing. It was a blighted ovum and she was going to miscarry. She went from the doctor appt to work where she fell apart, crying. Her supervisor sent her home and told her they would clock it as a "bereavement day." Not a sick day, not a personal day, a bereavement day.

I think that is the nicest acknowledgement of miscarriage I have heard of. Just wanted to share that there are understanding people in the world out there.
March 10, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterJill A.
Jill, your daughter in law works for a very compassionate person. Thank you for sharing a story of kindness.
March 11, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterAB
I am sorry for her loss, and yours. :(
March 12, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterCristiane
Thank you both for your kind thoughts. My heart hurts for my daughter-in-law. I have three women who I love as daughters; a daughter-in-law, a daughter-by-love (a good and close friend), and a daughter by blood. Between them, in the last five years, they have had four living children, three miscarriages, one full term, stillborn son, two c-sections and one close call of the the mother dying from complications. Always, they keep my heart full of love and of pain. That spills over here, where I try to get my words to convey some of that love to the other women posting here, women like me who have lost a child.

Life is so hard and so wonderful and such a mess! Peace to both of you and to all who read here. Even just a tiny bit of peace.
March 12, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterJill A.
Jill, I am so sorry for the losses of your daughters, through love, blood, and in-laws. Life is just so unpredictable. I'm happy that there's compassionate people out there to offer support, such as your daughter in law's boss. Thinking of you, and her.
March 13, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterNada
Nada, Thank you, I thought it was a thoughtful gesture on the part of the supervisor. That unpredictability cut like a knife, doesn't it?
March 13, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterJill A.
With both of my losses, my boss allowed me to take as much time as I wanted. I was very new to the company so I hadn't accumulated much time off but she told me not to worry about that, to come back when I was ready. My losses were relatively early as well (13 weeks and 6 weeks). I am so grateful to be working for such a kind, compassionate person. I'm so sorry for your and your daughters' losses Jill. I'm glad your daughter received that kindess and compassion from her supervisor.
April 3, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterJo