I went to my first support group meeting tonight. I was apprehensive at first but luckily I have a very good friend who came with me. It feels good to have friends who grieve for you. As I sat and listened to everyone's heartbreaking stories, I finally didn't feel so alone. It's one thing to read about it but to sit there and watch the pain unfold in front of you-it made me feel so close to these women. I see and know now how good it feels to talk about what happened. To find ways to honor my Maddie. To never stop talking about her. To help other mothers and reach out. I feel connected to all of you. I hope you all are finding ways to cope. And if you're not, a mom told me tonight that one of the things that pulled her out of a deep depression was another mom who lost a child telling her about a dream she had. She dreamt that her baby told her, "I don't want to be the reason you died too mom." From then on she decided she had to live. I can't believe this is the life I'm living but I have to. I have to live so that someone can keep Maddie's memory alive. So that she is remembered. Someone has to say her name everyday. I have to do that for Madeline.

Katrina
I am sorry you had to say goodbye to Maddie. Thank you for sharing how you found you first meeting. I was meant to go on Tuesday to one. I got so emotional about going and my husband isn't interested so I never went. I think I want to go, but I want to go with my husband. I want him to feel "included" and the generousity and love and hope that we give each other.

Thank you too tor reminding me that Audrey would want us to carry on.

Thank you again for sharing

Xxx